Just a little Sign, Please



 

When he signs "Love you" it's always to his sister, but this morning, it was to me, mom. My heart melted even if he did sign "Love you" while I'm changing a diaper.

 

 

When that perfect little bundle is handed to you and you stare down at those little eyes, that little nose, it doesn't matter who you are because suddenly that child in your arms is the most beautiful creature you have ever seen. To a mom, it doesn't matter if your little one is a boy, a girl, has Down Syndrome, is born with extra toes, born with sight problems, or is missing a limb. That child, resting in your arms is the most beautiful baby that has ever been born at that moment. Period. And you will protect, fight and love that baby with every thing inside you.

 

To most moms, especially NICU moms, that moment you lock them in the car seat to go home is the most joyous. You are now on your own after weeks or months in the NICU, to love and live with this tiny bundle entrusted to you. My Facebook post on the day we brought Bryce home after spending time in the NICU was:

 

"Ready......Set......GOOOOOOO!!! Here we go, all 4 of us are finally all together. Car seat locked in and off we go. Home."

 

From the time I was 17 weeks until Little B came at 34.2weeks, I fought to keep him in. I was on bed rest because of my high blood pressure and because Little B had tried to come as early as 21 weeks. I would lay around all day with a 4 year old active Miss A and try just to keep from having contractions. I remember one night, rushing the 25 minutes to the hospital, tears streaming down my face, praying to God "Please please not now!" I was having such strong contractions that I couldn't stand up, I couldn't breathe and they were coming every 2minutes. I was wheeled up to Labor and Delivery and when I saw the tiny NICU incubator and the 2 NICU nurses, I lost it. I was only 29 weeks, no this couldn't be happening. Thank goodness the doctor's controlled my labor and, after a 3 day stay on the L&D floor with meds pumping in my system, my contractions finally stopped. It would be 4 times total that I would be admitted and kept in L&D until finally, at 36 weeks, I was too far dilated to stop the labor safely. Little B was born with a hole in his lung called a Pneumothorax which caused his lungs to not inflate and my little man to struggle to breathe. After a CODE BLUE (where B stopped breathing altogether) and several very scary set backs, we were released from the NICU. We brought him into the doctor's office at 6weeks and had his hearing checked again, since he had failed both hearing tests in the NICU. He failed the one in the office as well. We were told he was very little and many times a NICU baby will fail a hearing test until they reach their gestational age. He would fail his hearing tests once more.

 

At 11months, thinking he had an ear infection, I took him into the office for a check up. He didn't have an ear infection, but the doctor noticed his ear canal was misshaped. He sent us home with instructions to see a specialist. The specialist would tell us that Little B was born with an "Organic Malformation" of his Ear drum and Ear canal. This means that when B was in utero, his ears didn't form right. We were told that he was deaf, that he would never talk. Big B and I were devastated. This was May of 2012.

 

How could we have a child who was deaf? How could that be? This wasn't in the plans. We had gotten pregnant with B without fertility drugs, without a doctor's help. that was a miracle since we were told we would not conceive without help and up until Little B, we hadn't. Then we dedicated Little B one year after we were told we would not conceive with IVF, to the month. Surely that was a sign, right? B was born is such a dramatic fashion, but he has never had breathing issues since, didn't need surgery and the hole closed so completely that the X-Ray Tech and the NICU doctor both had to make sure it was there to begin with. Surely that was God saying "I've got this Sticky Family". That HAD to be a sign, right? Deaf? Our baby boy was deaf? D-E-A-F! No, no NO...... clearly that had to be a mistake.

 

It wasn't. We spent the entire summer of 2012 talking to audiologists and speech therapists. We started getting services from Easter Seals and went to group play therapy. Our little man couldn't hear. As much as I would have liked to say " we took it all in stride" we didn't. Big B denied it because this was his little boy. I told only a handful of people because, right or wrong, I felt guilty for not being able to keep him in until the full 40 weeks. This was my fault, I just knew it. It wasn't my fault, it wasn't anyones fault.

 

By the time August came around I had absorbed myself in self pity long enough. I made one post on my Facebook page, telling all of our friends and family the news:

 

"After feeling sorry for myself for 3 months, I am finally done. Little B is deaf in his left ear and HOH in his right. We may have a child who can not hear, but his smile can light up a room."

 

The out poring of love from our family and friends was amazing. We had people getting us in contact with mother's here in our little part of Texas who were deaf or had hearing impaired kids. We had people who I knew had hearing problems calling and talking to us. I became closer to a women I know, who I now consider my "sounding board and helpful hints" in the deaf community. (Thank you Kimberly!!!) We had this amazing support system and we finally felt it okay to say the words "Special needs" without crying or feeling a choking since of anxiety.

 

It is now January 2013 and we have had so many amazing signs that our Little B is a true miracle. First is, we were told he was missing a a bone is his left ear. We had two scans confirming the missing bone, but after he was prayed for, the next scan showed a very underdeveloped hammer (the bone he was missing). The next came in speech. For months, Little B had made no oral sounds to try and speak, but more recently, he has made great strides. He now waves and says "I". He understands some simple commands and can sign up to 20 different signs. He is truly amazing, and we are no longer afraid to tell the world about our little boy.

 

Still, with all this wonderful strides he is making, I still worry. You see, this week is the week he gets his hearing aids. This week is the week we go and get those outward signs that says "something is wrong" to the world. As a logical person, I know that is really is needed and helpful and important, but as a mom.......... As a mom I am scared. Will people stare? Will they say something rude? Will they judge him? or worse feel sorry for him? Will kids make fun of him when he is a little older? Will he fit in? I'm scared. I'm nervous.

 

I know that once the aids go in, his speech will improve. I long to hear him say "Mom" just once. I will cry the day he does because I have waited so very long for him to say anything, but that word "mom"...... that is my dearest word. I can't wait to watch his face when has hears his sister's voice or when he hears music. I understand these aids are important, I get it. I'm just nervous. No parent wants their kid to be "different" even though each child brings with them a difference that is profound and all their own. Once he puts on the hearing aids, the world will know that he can not hear correctly without them. It's normal to feel apprehensive. It's okay to have these feelings. It's okay to feel unsure about the future. It's normal. Every mom or deaf person I have talked to has had these feelings or something similar, so I understand it's okay. I know that our little community of family and friends who love us will accept Little B no matter what he looks like, But the world can be cruel sometimes and I worry. 

 

He is my Little B, my little miracle, my little man. He is my child and I will fight and protect and love him. I will change him and tear up when he signs "Love You" and rejoice when he dances with his special headphones on made for HOH people. I love him because he is my baby. I thank God everyday for giving me him.

 

But I worry.

 

Mama Jelly 

 

 

 

Oragnization in the mist of paper confetti

Today I have a helper who is eager to learn all about organization. Okay, the truth is, if I get out my computer, Little B gets out his and then signs for me to "sit". He likes to work alongside mommy, but working is hard, so a snack is always needed.

 

 

Yesterday I sat down 4 times to write a blog post about organization and my quest to have a better organized home by the end of 2013. Each time I sat down, inevitably one or the other child would need something. At one point, I was doing the chores list I printed out. I was going along, checking off things and feeling accomplished. I was one proud peacock, until I turned the corner and saw that both kids had found the one confetti stick from New Year's Celebration at the Children's museum. For whatever reason I had put one of the confetti sticks, still full, into the diaper bag and carried it home. I'll stop here and mention that it never fails, my diaper bag is a variable "Mary Poppins" carpet bag. I promise, sometimes I pull out lamps and mirrors from the very bottom...... maybe even a potted plant or two.

 

I digress. One of the kids, the youngest dirtiest one, found this stick and was shaking it. A few pieces of tissue paper confetti came out. This prompted the other one, the larger less dirty one, to grab the stick and shake it hard. There was a loud POP and BAM! Confetti everywhere. Both kids thought this was a perfect way to spend a few minutes and proceeded to throw the confetti around. I, however, looked on my carefully thought out chores list for "clean up confetti", sadly it was on there. I think the original author is missing out on not cleaning up confetti. It wasn't until last night, when I, at 2:30am finally crawled into bed, found more confetti on my side of the bed. Apparently the stairs were not enough to contain this awesomeness, and one of the kids felt the need to stuff our covers with it. It was like a party happened in our bed and I was the last to arrive. Sigh.....

 

Anyway, what's the point of today's post? Organization? Oh yes, that's right. I was on my favorite site PINTEREST!!!! Pinterest oh how I heart thee.

 

I'm on Pinterest in preparation for my organizational trip this year. I stumbled across a few "Home Management" binders with free printables and great ideas. I started thinking "why yes, I do believe I can put together a home Management Binder". I came across a really great article on Money Saving Mama. she has several free printables to add to a home binder. I say, go check it all out and use what will work for you. Today, I'll walk you through my first few pages.

 

I mainly used this one site for the majority of my binder. This women makes organizational skills look effortless. I wonder if I should hire her to make me organized and therefore I will make it look easy? Hummmmm something to think about.

 

Anyway, the blog is called Organizing Homelife and she sure does. Here is the link to the beginning of her 31 Days of Home Management where she has all her printables for her binder. They all rock!!! Check out the link Here.

 

 

So to start, here is where I am at.

I used an old school binder from college way back when I went in 1778. It's the first binder ever made! LOL

 

 

So here I should mention that I am....... um thrifty? Okay, I'll admit it, I'm cheep. I didn't want to print out 365 pages of "daily chores" and "daily Plan of attacks" so I did what we do in homeschool. I made wipe offs the cheep way.

1 sheet of printed on paper

1 page protector

1 dry erase marker

 

TA-DA

(Jazz hands? Yes, I think it's warranted)

 

 I guess Little B either found the dry erase marker, or he has a plan of attack he wants known.

 

I printed out the "Plan of Attack" sheets from HERE in this LINK. I like these because it gives me a quick snippet of what the day will bring, what times things occur etc. Even having a place for me to plan out Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner. I know, I'm creative with my waffles and Leftovers.

 

These I covered in those page protectors and then, at the end of the week I just wipe it off and start over.

 

Money Saving Mom has a ton of Printables to choose from to make up what some Home Management binders may lack for you. While I mainly used one, I added some pages from here as well.

 

 

I am currently using her own cleaning list until I can come up with some of my own add ons. For now, she has a great stepping off point.

 

 

So there you have it, the start to my Home Management Binder. Tomorrow I'll show how I do my calendar, manage my blog ideas, and manage my ever growing to-do list.

 

Mama Jelly

 

 

 

 

 



100 Days 100 Things Challenge

Picture used from: http://springvalley.govoffice.com/

Spring is here. I just love spring, I love the colors, the warmth, the birds, the flowers. Here is South Texas, we have "spring" about 3 months out of the year. When I lived in Saint Louis, MO however, spring was a great time of year. It kicked off every year, it seemed, with the St. Patrick's Day parade. Shortly after that parade, you would start to see walkers in forest Park, the Zoo would begin to get busy again. Strollers, bikes, families come out from everywhere. It is a great time of year anywhere in the country.

Recently, we took some pictures of Miss A and Little B among the Bluebonnets. We are in Texas after all! You HAVE to have pictures of the kids surrounded by this beautiful flowers.

I love this one of Miss A and her red boots.

This one of Little Bman makes me smile. He is just shy of 9 months and his chubby legs are too cute.

This is just too beautiful.

While most people who love spring, love the flowers, some, like myself, start to get the itch to spring clean. Since Little Bman was born last June, I find myself surrounded with

 tons of "stuff" that gets accumulated when you are a family.

I was talking online with some mom friends, recently and we were talking about spring cleaning. One mom had said that if she didn't do something , her junk would quickly become an episode of Hoarders. This got me thinking, why do I have so much junk? Why am I consumed with having all of this? Why do I feel the need to keep buying things? Is it because of deals I get? Is it because I don't want to get rid of things? I'm not sure.

I was introduced to the book 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess  by Jen Hatmaker. She has her own blog which I love to follow. She is a pastors wife who was convicted in her spirit to go through a month of giving up things. Only eating 7 foods, giving away 7 things a day etc. Her book is powerful and inspiring. Her blog is, in my humble opinion, an amazing and biblical look at how to live with less and use what you have. She inspires me. Check her out here.

After talking with my friends, I realized a common thread through all of the talk was "HELP!!!! I HAVE TONS OF JUNK!!!!!!" So I purposed to my mom friends a 100 days to get rid of 100 things. I named it the 100 things 100 days Challenge. Starting May 1 and going through August 8, every single day, I will be giving away, going through, organizing, selling and trashing 100 things. We set up rules and plan to kick this off in a few weeks. Some of my friends have already started, since right now is yard sale season and a few are moving soon. But as a group, we are doing the challenge.

How will this work? you ask. What if I don't have 100 of one thing? Can I just give away 100 Q-Tips and be done? Nope!

Here is how we are working it:

Starting May 1:

Each week will have a theme and everyday that week, I will post an item to go through. You can get rid of 10 of that thing or 1, the amount is not the point. Here is an example:

Week 1:

Mommy Clothes

Day 1:

Jeans/bottoms/skirts

Today, go through all your bottoms, skirts and  jeans and get rid of any that are out of style, don't fit, have holes ("uncool" holes of course) have missing zippers, buttons, stains, undone hem lines etc.

I have encouraged my friends to post pictures of the items that are leaving the house. The biggest rule that goes with this; Not to buy back the item that has left. You can't donate books to the library and turn around and buy 10 books, that just defeats the purpose of getting rid of them. You can sell items if they are sellable, donate items that are not sellable and trash items that need to be trashed. But they need to leave, get out of the house, and make room for LESS stuff.

The point of the exercise is two fold. First, I don't know about you all, but spring cleaning sort of stresses me out. I have this unrealistic view that my house needs to be spotless by the time the first day of summer rolls around. It makes me crazy and makes me feel like I'm behind. Taking 100 days to go through 100 areas in your life, makes it easy and attainable. Second, I am a visual person. i need to physically see the items marching out the door and see the items getting organized, to feel I am accomplishing something. And the best part? You don't have to participate everyday. Let's say it's "Son Week" and you don't have a son. Follow along with the blog, but you don't have to purge that week. By breaking down the organization and cleaning process into small, daily goals, by the start of the school year, you will have a home that is functioning, organized and more importantly C.L.E.A.N. Won't that be great?!

I sure think so!

Join us and follow along with this blog and see the 100 things 100 Days Challenge take shape. I'm hoping to have a few guest bloggers come on and talk about the challenge as well.

I'm excited!!! Aren't you?!

Mama Jelly